eurovision

Eurovision 2019! by Meryle Cox

Its that time of year again!  Eurovision 2019 week!  The Semi Finals start today and The finals are on Saturday May 18th 2019!  I will be co Hosting a Eurovision Livestream party with my friend and Eurovision enabler Rena, at Paupers Pub in Toronto.  Pre show starts 1pm and the show starts at 3pm but we advise you GET THERE SUPER EARLY It was packed last year and there is limited seating!

Normally I’d have posted this closer to when the all 41 participants video was released, but life has been a little busy, and Eurovision definitely snuck up on me this year!  This year is queer as ever, and full of pathos, and I’m for it!  Here is my take on each song from this year!

Official ReCap video of all 41 Eurovision 2019 participants first impressions!

Albania - Jonida Maliqi: Ktheju tokës - PATHOS!  Cant have Eurovision without pathos and you can’t have Eurovision pathos without getting wet.  If you aren’t being drenched with rain in the video or stage show did you ever truly love? No. 

Armenia - Srbuk: Walking Out - Her voice is fantastic and this song stomps.  really hope her bare chested male dancers join her on stage, cause there choreo is intense!

Australia - Kate Miller-Heidke: Zero Gravity - Perfect Eurovision song.  Period the end.  Australia might win this year and wouldn’t that be weird. Weird, not that a beautiful woman with an angelic sounding voice, standing dead still on stage in an epic dress with weird flailing ghost dancers wining Eurovision would be weird.  But weird as in “Eurovision is being hosted in Australia?” weird.

Austria - PÆNDA: Limits - You, you, yoooooou.  I know exactly how old she is based on her tattoos.  Teen in the 90’s 1000%.  Lovely voice and song, but wether it will land in the finals or not all depends on the stage show.

Azerbaijan - Chingiz: Truth - If the stage show is anything like the video I am excited!  We’ve got celestial galactic sparkle space twinks, and neon black light babes, can’t wait to see it live!

Belarus - Zena: Like it - Yes you like JLO. Yes you like JLO, you like jLO.  Big fan of the bi pride flag colours that is the lighting, hope she brings that queer energy to the stage.  Might not make it to finals.

Belgium - Eliot: Wake up - What fucking creepy-ass harem of pale girls is this?? It seems like every year there is a creepy white boy singing a creepy possessive stalker song and this feels like that song this year.  Lets see if he brings the handmaids in his music video to Tel Aviv.

Croatia - Roko: The Dream - Meh  k.  I am bothered that Croatia cant be bothered to make a video.  A fucking headshot?  This is Eurovision, go into the fucking hills get someone with an iPhone and video editing software, you can make something for so cheap.  Anyway I’ll be shocked if this makes it to the finals.

Cyprus -  Tamta: Replay - Ah Eurovision!   Where sexy Cyprian women perform songs that were obviously written for Rihanna but she passed on it.  Big fan of the sex honey in the video but will they go full sploosh on the stage?  Who knows, Eurovision is wild and kinky!

Czech republic - Lake Malawi: Friend of a Friend - adorable!  Two Door Cinema is PISSED they didn’t write this song.  I jam to it.

Denmark - Leonora: Love Is Forever - UGH.  ITS SO 1960s Eurovision.  its classic Eurovision corny saccharine naive “wholesome love song” and I hate it.  Looks like Lilly Tomlin’s Edith Ann shtick, but not as fun.

Estonia - Victor Crone: Storm - First off victor looks like the dude from Creed so Im already mad.  Second: this is just a shitty re-write of last Eurovision’s “Storms don’t last forever” from UK

Finland- Darude feat. Sebastian Rejman: Look Away - FIRST OF ALL: Legendary Darude!  Sounds like a Darude song, great, love it.  Second: YOU CANT HAVE PATHOS ABOUT BEING IN LOVE AT EUROVISION WITHOUT GETTING WET!  And Darude seems to be doing gender swapped The Shape of Water.

France - Bilal Hassani: Roi - Eurovision is always very gay and queer but this year is their first Non-Binary participant.  This song is beautiful and brings chills, I see this Italy, and Australia being the songs to battle it out for top spot!

Georgia - Oto Nemsadze: Keep on Going - Stop yelling at me man bun, yikes!

Germany - S!isters: Sisters -They are sisters in a band called S!ster singing a song called Sisters….. or the other way around idk. Oh and they are VERY MUCH not related.  And if you couldn’t tell that?  Look at them, what’s wrong with you?!

Greece - Katerine Duska: Better Love - This is what Katy Perry wishes she was.  I love everything about this video, it’s amazing aesthetic, her beautiful voice can’t wait for the stage show.

Hungary - Joci Pápai: Az én apám - i like it.  don’t know how well it will do but its a lovely song.  First Na na na of the contest. 

Iceland - Hatari: Hatrið mun sigra - HERE COME THE ANARCHIST GOTH STOMPERS!  As a goth myself, I love it.  I would some out to this at a club called “bat cave” or “Sanctuary” or something like that.  They have publicly identified as pro-Palistine, so they may pull something political if they get to the finals.  Hell they may blow their political load in the semi’s.

Ireland - Sarah McTernan: 22 - Well Hello Irish Barbie!  Cute song, won’t finish too high, but she has a good voice.  I bet she loves Anna Nicole Smith, but hates the drugs.

Isreal - Kobi Marimi: Home - So here’s the thing.  Eurovision costs A LOT of money to host.  And some countries send songs that they know will not win, just to stay in the contest and pretend like they are trying.  This is “meh” Il Divo in english nonsense makes no sense coming from Israel after a wild track like Netta’s last year, but Israel doesn’t want to win this year.  oObviously.

Italy - Mahmood: Soldi - Like Ermal Meta in 2017, Mahmood decided to bring a “fuck dad, he was a bastard!” song to Italy’s Sanremo song contest and he won with it.  It’s a beautiful song, and I think it’s gonna go far in the finals.

Latvia - Carousel: That Night - Cute, nice voice, NOT a Eurovision song, bet it won’t get to the finals.

Lithuania - Jurij Veklenko: Run With The Lions - Generic pop rock faux inspirational blah blah.  This guy reminds you of that one “champ” at Karaoke who sings shit like Imagine Dragons.

Malta - Michela: Chameleon - This song is awesome but has this person never heard of Boy George and “Karma Chameleon”???

Moldova - Anna Odobescu: Stay - This music video is the WORST car ad I’ve ever seen.  Also once again proving at Eurovision, you aren’t REALLY feeling love if you aren’t completely soaking wet.

Montenegro - D mol: Heaven - It’s The Duggers: The Musical! This looks and sounds like some creepy ass American “christian ministries!” music group.  And the song is called ‘Heaven” so I’m probably not wrong.  Its got all the joy of white American racists at a post lynching party.

North Macedonia - Tamara Todevska: Proud - IS THIS A DRAMATIC LESBIAN SONG!?  I hope so!  But it’s probably just a “feminist anthem” which is ok too!

Norway - KEiiNO: Spirit in the Sky - Classic Eurovision Euro-trash dance song.  what the fuck is that bald guy singing?  can’t wait to see more drum nonsense in their stage show!!

Poland - Tulia: Fire of Love (Pali się) - This is not an appropriate Eurovision song, and it’s creepy as hell.  I love it tho.

Portugal - Conan Osiris: Telemóveis - I…  I just…  Welcome to classic Eurovision: Thats Weird as Shit! Edition staring Portugal.  Its almost a cool avant thingy but it’s really not.  Why is the dancer like that?  En pointe in nikes? Dancing so close to the singer (as a clown friend pointed out)???? Cant wait to see this mess of a stage show!

Romania - Ester Peony: On a Sunday - Big dramatic pop song with a hard slow sexy dance beat.  I love it, And can’t wait to see what shoulder based outfit she wears on stage!

Russia - Sergey Lazarev: Scream - Earnest and Dramatic it might do well depending on the stage performance.  I like the Dragon knight and princes classic narrative and hope it remains in the stage show.

San Marino - Serhat: Say Na Na Na - The second Na na na of the contest! Say Na na na!  What more is there to know? Say na na na!  if you want this to make sense? Nope! na na na!

Serbia - Nevena Božović: Kruna - She’s really cute, she has a nice voice she’s over doing it a bit and HEY PYRO!  Will she make it to the finals?  idk.

Slovenia - Zala Kralj & Gašper Šantl: Sebi - WHATS THAT I SEE!?  SLAVS IN ADIDAS TRACKSUITS?  PLEASE SQUAT TO ACHIEVE FULL MEME STATUS! Chill beats I like it. 

Spain - Miki: La Venda - Upbeat, better than the past two years (but thats damning) lots of fun, there better be a dance party on stage!

Sweden - John Lundvik:  Too Late For Love - Ahh… ok, I like it, but do you feel like maybe Sweden saw how well Cesar Sampson placed last year and thought “pfft!  we can do that better!”  But at the same time the contest is pretty white so this is needed in the finals.  The song is good tho, that’s for sure. 

Switzerland - Luca Hänni: She Got Me - Why is a Swiss guy doing Moroccan/Turkish style music?  Idk but I personally like it, but not sure it’ll get past the semi’s.

The Netherlands - Duncan Laurence: Arcade - I like it, pathos, damning love lyrics.  OH WHATS THAT?  THERE’S PATHOS?  YES! YES HE IS WET! Can’t wait to see the stage treatment, it will make or break this song.

UK - Michael Rice: Bigger Than Us - Generic soaring inspiring blue eyed soul clap along arena song.  I’m never gonna remember it when Eurovision is over.  He also has a hard time keeping on key!

Phew what a line up! I predict a tight race between Italy, Australia and France with Australia taking it, unless France brings an amazing performance! See you Saturday!


Eurovision 2018! (+ Post show Edits) by Meryle

It’s almost that time of year again!  The Eurovision Song contest is coming!  That cheesy, over the top glorious annual song competition that pits every European country (and Australia, stick with us) against each other in a spectacle of ridiculous pop music that has to be seen to be believed.  I say believed instead of understood, because I’ve watched Eurovision and I still don’t understand it. 
May 8th 2018 the Semi-finals begin in Lisbon Portugal (Home country of Last years winer Salvador Sobral) and the Finals will air Saturday May 12th.  And in my home city of Toronto I will be co-hosting a Eurovision 2018 live-streaming party with my friend Rena Ashton at Paupers Pub on Bloor St west near Bathurst subway station.  Check out the facebook event for more details

Much like my love of wrestling, I’m addicted to watching Eurovision for the horror, the hilarity, the shock of the badness, and also the surprise moments of beauty and undeniable talent.  I watched my first Eurovision last year after being invited to a friend’s viewing party, and after that WILD ride, I’m ready and excited to watch the calamity again this year! 

If you have never heard of Eurovision or think you know nothing about it, you’re wrong, past winners have been the worldwide launching point of acts like Abba, Celine Dion, and Lordi (remember Lordi?) Conchita Wurst (you know, the bearded opera drag queen?) and acts like Julio Iglasias, Lulu, and Olivia Newton-John have performed songs in the contest.

Not every song from ever country makes it to the finals but here is a recap video of all 43 entrants into this years contest. 

And here is my opinion of every song:

  1. Eugene Bushpepa - Mall (Albania): 1998, somewhere on the road in North America.  The windows of your car are down, there’s barely anyone on the road and the radio is blasting AOR (Adult Oriented Rock) music.  You don’t know where you are driving to, you just know you had to get out of the city because you had FEELINGS™ you couldn’t explain, and you just needed to go somewhere and SORT OUT YOUR THOUGHTS™.  You light an anxiety cigarette, hoping the ennui and existential void in front of you will diminish.  It will not.  You still have FEELINGS™ you long to escape from so you sing along to the song on your car stereo at the top of your lungs.  This is that song.
  2. Sevak Khanagyan - Qami (Armenia): That dance beat, that rock solo guitar that pathos background gospel choir, Armenia, I FEEL you! Plus the video looks like some Shape of Water break up angst video
  3. Jessica Mauboy - We got love (Australia): Oh Australia!  We have an excellent pop R&B style singer standard uplift pop song lyrics and a faster Celine Dion “and that’s the way it is” vibe.  “Don’t give up!  Cause we got love!” Classic top-notch pop song formula. It won’t win.
  4. Cesar Sampson - Nobody but You (Austria):  ABSOLUTELY NO JOKES FROM ME ON THIS SONG!  I have chills listening to this.  His voice is beautiful, his falsetto is angelic, this is an exceptionally talented performer and I will be searching out more. MUST WATCH!
  5. Aisel - x my heart (Azerbaijan): This is Eurovision realness!  the cheesy Eurodance beat, the standard love lyrics that MAKE NO SENSE (I cross my heart, I tear down the firewalls, I cross my heart I’m stronger than cannonballs????), basic, but classic, what I expect from Eurovision.
  6. Alekseev - Forever (Belarus): Once again this year I ask BELARUS WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!  This song is what happens when a serial killer writes a Muse song. In the video he is WET, laughing maniacally, failing at push ups (seriously) and has that Bill Skarsgård Ugly-hot look. 
  7. Sennek - A Matter of Time (Belgium): Dark pop song, with a talented vocalist who looks like she’s about to perform a  witch ritual with Florence Welch to undo all of Lana Del Ray’s plastic surgery and bring her back to the coven.
  8. Equinox - Bones (Bulgaria): “I love beyond the bones!” Looks like Darryl Hanna’s Robot character in Blade Runner started a mild alternative dance band that writes love songs even though they don’t understand human emotions.
  9. Franka - Crazy (Croatia):  Franka you are not Amy Winehouse and this is not your “Back to Black”, ok? Video is HIGH FASHION™
  10. Elena Foureira - Fuego (Cyprus):  “Who are my influences?  Oh I love Rhianna, and Beyonce, I wish I could have their careers, you know?  And Kylie’s Fever was huge influence growing up.”
  11. Nikolas Josef - Lie to Me (Czech Republic): *SIGH* Prettyboy pop needs to be stopped.  Justin Timberlake needs to atone for what he has inspired.  The second that Brass band trumpet sample hits I’m yelling “NO” at my screen.  Stop this fuckboy nonsense right now.
  12. Rasmussen - Higher Ground (Denmark): Sounds like a hipster anthem, looks like a bunch of clean vikings, feels like my “Proud of my Nordic heritage” dogwhistle alarm bells are going off.
  13. Elina Nechayeva - La Forza (Estonia): YES THIS IS THE EUROVISION I’M LOOKING FOR! Exceptional soprano opera singing, dark dance beats, glitter everywhere, this is what Eurovision is about.  I hate it, but damn that’s talent.
  14. Eye Cue - Lost and Found (F.Y.R. Macedonia): If you only watched the Official recap video you would think this song was just A 2014 moody club banger.  But when you watch the whole video you realize its actually 3 songs mashed into one.  Two of those songs vibe together and make a great intro and chorus.  The other song, the main verses, has a sanitized WHITE PEOPLE™ reggae beat that sounds like a song MAGIC! wrote and sold because they were too embarrassed to release it themselves.  
  15. Saara Aalto - Monsters (Finland): I love this song!  it is 100% a 2010 Rhianna Club banger, and I’m here for it! EMPOWERMENT™ jam!
  16. Madame Monsieur - Mercy (France):  I want to make fun of this band's aesthetic (OH THE FRENCH BAND IS IN BLACK TURTLENECKS AND SKINNY BLACK JEANS, HOW FUCKING FRENCH OF YOU, DID YOU LOOSE YOUR BERET, WHERE IS IT!?) but the song is clearly a pro-refugee song, and considering the negative politics in France over refugees I can’t hate.
  17. Iriao - For You (Georgia): This feels like a men’s stoic drinking choir went too far and they don’t know how to back out so they’re trying REALLY seriously.
  18. Michael Schulte - You let me walk alone (Germany): Watch out Ed Shernan!  This cute ginger who sings better than you is coming for your ballad career! WHOLESOME™
  19. Yianna Terzi - Oneiro Mou (Greece): - There’s a point in Eurovision viewing where you just start to feel nothing.  Its so bland, and there’s nothing bad, but nothing to hang on to.  yeah the voice is great, it’s epic, sounds ethnically greek while dance music but… nothing.  I feel nothing.
  20. AWS- Viszlat Nyar (Hungary): YES!  RAISE THOSE HORNS!  IT’S THE RETURN OF THE EUROVISION METAL POP SONG!  Epic vocals and screamo vocals, metal guitars, you get one of these every few years and it is a glorious change of pace in every show.
  21. Ari Olafsso - Our Choice (Iceland): Do you like plain white bread?  Do you like milk?  Is salt too spicy for you?  Then good news!  This song is for you.  Ugh.
  22. Ryan O’Shaughnessy - Together (Ireland): Wholesome™ gay love song!  It sounds like Sam Smith’s falsetto finally found true love and is mushy happy about it.
  23. Netta - Toy (Isreal):  If you only watch one whole Eurovision 2018 contestant video THIS IS THE ONE.  It’s weird, it’s banging, there’s chicken scatting samples (no, I mean she’s literally making “Bock” noises as beat samples, don’t be gross) I would not be surprised if this song won!
  24. Ermal Meta and Fabrizio Moro - Non Mi Avete Fatto Niente (Italy): I loved last year’s entry of Francesco Gabbani's Occidentali’s Karma SO MUCH I still listen to it, so this is bumming me the fuck out. Two thoughts: 1) Yeah I also like 2003 Juanes, but leave it in 2003.  2) It’s 1998, somewhere on the road in North America.  The windows of your car are down, there’s barely anyone on the road and the radio is blasting AOR (Adult Oriented Rock) music.  You don’t know where you are driving to, you just know you had to get out of the city because you had FEELINGS™ you couldn’t explain, and you just needed to go somewhere and SORT OUT YOUR THOUGHTS™…. (see Albania for the rest) 
    POST SHOW EDIT: Ok.  I'm a dick.  I found out what the song is about (The Bataclan, Paris and Ariana Grande terrorist attacks) and I was a little too glib and dismissive in my comments.  But I still stand 100% by my "See Albania" comment ESPECIALLY since I've found out Ermal Meta is Albanian-Italian.  PSYCHIC™
  25. Laura Risotto - Funny Girl (Latvia): Official SAD™ Anthem for that beautiful but shy cosplay/steampunk chick you know who is just looking for the Joker to her Harley.  
  26. Ieva Zasimauskaite - When We’re Old (Lithuania): HER PARENTS ARE STILL TOGETHER AND IN LOVE AND SHE CANT WAIT FOR THAT TO BE US OK? WHOLESOME™ and she likes Enya.
  27. Christabelle - Taboo (Malta): Welcome to the PG version of Caligula.  You ever met an virgin woman so desperate and obvious that they constantly acted over-sexed and BDSM obsessed in public in order to try and cover for being an obvious and desperately skin hungry virgin?  That’s this video. The song?  Its a standard generic “I love early Rhianna” dance song.
  28. DoReDos - My Lucky Day (Moldova): AH Moldova!  Always gives us some crazy dance songs (e.g. “Epic Sax Guy”) I love this, and not just because her Hat is bigger than both of them in the video.  It’s got a bit of a fast paced Klezmer or Romani vibe and its catchy!  I wanna see this song in the finals!
  29. Vanja Radovanovic - Inje (Montenegro): Fuck off Montenegro.  This epic, earnest mediocre song pisses me off. You’re not a Holy Angel, just stop.
  30. Alexander Rybak - Thats how you write a song (Norway): 2009 Eurovision winner Alex Rybak is bak! (HA!)  This song is cheesy and dorky as fuck in the lyric department but I love it.  Alex always has really interesting rhythmic compositions and fun catchy tunes.  I like him, I don’t care what other people think, this cheese smells good to me!
  31. Gromee featuring Lukas Meijer - Light it up (Poland): - One of the joys of Eurovision is the English as a Second Language lyrics.  This song, which sounds like a 2010 EDM pop hit, takes the english slang “Get Lit” and mistranslates it into “Light me up”.  Ok, Gromee, I will light you up, what are you wanting? Shots of the Wodka or bottles of Budvar? Why not both (of the things I have for offering to you)?
  32. Claudia Pascoal - o Jardim (Portugal): - Beautiful Butch femme Lesbian chill groove love song, giving me them chills!  Portugal brings us Butch teen Beiber look-a-like and Pink haired awkward-gait manic pixie dream femme doing beautiful harmonies together.  I love it!
  33. The Humans - Goodbye (Romaina): - Do NOT tell Sass Jordan that an Eastern European look-a-like is doing Sass Jordan better than Sass Jordan has done in decades.
  34. Julia Samoylova - I won’t Break (Russia): Julia was banned from representing Russia in last years Eurovision contest because of the politics around Russia annexing Crimea.  She’s back and she’s good but… The way they play off her Spinal muscular atrophy and use of a wheelchair has been a little cringe and inspiration porn in the past, so if she gets through the semi-finals it will be interesting to see how they present her in the final performance.  The video for her entry is worth watching simply because (spoiler) at the end of the video she is revealed to have been A SENTIENT HUMAN-HEAD MOUNTAIN THIS WHOLE TIME.
  35. Jessika featuring Jennifer Brenning - Who we are (San Marino): This song is a mess.  Gorgeous vocals, bizarre lyrics, no hook, musically all over the place, TERRIBLE white girl rapping. And not to mention this is a OBVIOUS rip off of the 2015 Eurovision winner Måns Zelmerlöw's Heroes.
  36. Sanja illic & Balkanika - Nova Deca (Serbia): - This band has a hipster wizard on flute, and a Faith Hill Look alike singer.  Lots of Serbian indigenous vocalizations and harmonizing. Is it good?  Who cares, they have a wizard and a guy playing giant garbage can drums!
  37. Lea Sirk - Havala Ne (Slovenia):  This lady likes MIA, clearly, but also basic as hell dance moves.  This song is fun, and is creative and trying to be different than your average Eurovision dance song.  Thumbs up, not shitty!
  38. Amaia y Alfred - Tu Cancan (Spain): After Spain’s TERRIBLE last place performance I get why they would want to play it safe with a cute boy/girl ballad.  Your boring WASP, Christian grandma would like this song, and think it was adorable.  But you?  You have better taste than her.
  39. Benjamin Ingrosso - Dance you off (Sweden): Once again Sweden doing what Sweden does best: Handsome, catchy pop-tactic dance floor fillers!  No doubt your pre-teen sister is already in love with this guy, even if she doesn’t know it yet.
  40. Zibbz - Stones (Switzerland): Bluesy powerful female vocals, hipster hard rock, and great band name! Singalong potential, I like it!
  41. Waylon - Outlaw in ‘Em (The Netherlands): FUCKING Waylon.  This guy is PISSED that he wasn’t born in the United States.  He wants to be country rock “Don’t tread on me/I’m proud of my confederate ancestors!” SO BADLY.  But here’s the thing Waylon: you’re from the Netherlands, your country is WAY better off economically and socially than United States and COPPERHEAD ROAD WAS ALREADY WRITTEN.  Get out of here Waylon!  I hope you DON'T make it to the finals.
    POST SHOW EDIT: He made it to the finals.  And it was a "Look I'm not racist, I have Black Friends!" shucking and jiving racist mess.
  42. Melovin - Under the Ladder (Ukraine): Hard rock grand piano playing angry singalong!  Their finalist video includes a lot of things on fire, so I think Billy Joel would be proud.
  43. Surie - Storm (United Kingdom) I can’t tell if Surie is trying to be Katy Perry (Fireworks) or Annie Lennox (Little Bird).  Fun poppy paint by numbers song, easy to relate to lyrics and sing-a-long chorus, sometimes you want simple sugary pop hooks and this song brings you that delicious frosted vanilla cake you crave.

Autism Journal #1 by Meryle

Last week was the Eurovision 2017 song contest, and admittedly it was the first time I had ever watched the whole contest and not just clips of ridiculousness.  I was raised in a very artistic household, but my parents' art tastes tended to be on the intellectual and avant-garde side of the creative spectrum, and as such, the grandiose ridiculosity of Eurovision was not on our radar at all.  But it sure is on my radar NOW after what I saw last week.

I was invited to a viewing party in my friends basement and it was attended by burlesque producers, drug free anime ravers, and most of the members of a Jewish Accapella choir that performs Jewish-themed parody versions of popular songs (yes they are very popular at the local bat/bah-mitzvahs, how did you know?!).  I got there a half an hour late, just in time to see Italy perform (Francessco Gabbani a.k.a. my love, my soulmate, no big deal) and immediately I fell into my oblivious shit-talking and sassy questions/commentary that had everyone laughing and the host hugging me saying “aah!  I’m so glad you are here I knew I needed you for this”

Watching Eurovision was a wild time and super fun! I have so many thoughts on the Contest itself and all the hilarious anecdotes from the party that I could write about, but this story isn’t about those things.

 It is about Portugal winning, and autism.

Salvador Sobral won Eurovision with his sister Luisa’s song Amare Pelos Dios, but hours before that happened, as I sat in that basement waiting for his performance to start, my friend turned to me and said, "there is rumour he’s on the spectrum.”

 

There are two things in this world that will make me throw my fists up in the air and yell “MY PEOPLE”:

1) When welsh people do very welsh things,

and

2) ESPECIALLY when autistic people are exceptional in public.  

 

I don’t know if he or his family know what high-functioning autism is, let alone if they know he has it.  They have been very private and secretive about his heart condition (denying reports about it for awhile) so they may know he is (probably) Aspergers, or they may not know.

But watching him during the performance and the things I have seen of him since, he absolutely comes off as very much 'my people'.

Watching his performance the physical signs were obvious to me. The awkward movments of his hands during his performances were the first signs.  Alone, hand gestures like that can seem like nothing but an akward affectation.  But that was not the only sign he showed.  The non-reactional "*shrug* hey of we won!” attitude to winning suggested the delayed emotional processing we can experience, but once he got to the acceptance speech, I was sure he was on the spectrum.

 

“we live in a world of disposable music; fast food music without any content.  I think this could be a victory for music with people who make music that actually means something.  Music is not fireworks; music is feeling.  So let's try to change that and bring music back”

 

Wow.  He said that after winning the biggest, flashiest, pop song contest in the world.  And watching his face and the heartfelt way he gave the speech (in English, not his first language of Portuguese) I could tell, he had NO IDEA how rude his speech was to all the other contestants.  “Wow that’s some shade.” said the party host, “That’s some autism, that’s what that is!” I responded.  "I bet has no clue why what he said was rude”

As an autistic person, i know the subtle things we do that are different from what neurotypicals do, and neurotypicals tend to see these things as being willfully rude or eccentric without understanding that what they are actually witnessing is autism.  A person who doesn’t know autism may attempt to argue with me that those behaviours could be indicative of anything, or that I am not able to “guess" a diagnosis.  But the thing is, I am able.  I live autism, I know autism. Because I am so acutely aware of how NOT like everyone else I am, anything I see that acts like me stands out like a spotlight in the dark.

Salvador’s post-win performance proved his autism to me without a doubt.  He invited his sister Luisa to sing the song with him.  He sang the first bit, and when he passed the mic off to Luisa the audience exploded at how deep and beautiful her voice was.  And behind her Salvador started happy-flapping, clapping and jumping up and down with excitement.  Nobody flails like an autistic person, and Salvador is clearly autistic.  

And let me be clear: his abilities are stunning.

Since the show (aside from my constantly listening to and swooning over Gabbani’s Occidentali's Karma) I have seen a lot more physical proof that Salvador is on the spectrum.  The most obvious one I found was a picture of him on stage holding the award, confetti flying all around him, just staring into the distance with a Mlem sticking out of his mouth.  To paraphrase the Foxworth joke structure: If you’re staring into the void with your tongue sticking partway out your mouth, you just might just be autistic.

Autism is a spectrum, but our society only really talks about the extreme autistic who suffer from co-morbid diseases and disabilities that make their condition extremely visible and hard to manage.  This is not the most common form of an autistic person.  There are many more Autistic people who look and act like Salvador, Dan Harmon, Daryl Hanna or David Byrne, and a lot of times regular people don’t realize this because autism isn’t want they think it is.  And I think its time for us to change that.